There’s no such thing as Adam without them—that version of Adam simply doesn’t exist. Maybe he’ll learn someday, but for now, he’s definitely NOT boyfriend material.What’s Henry’s email address? about how to determine if he’s really over his ex-wife.In my response, I provide the tell-tale signs that he’s not over his ex-wife, how to tell whether he’s ready for a relationship with you, and how to … There is nothing here that says “good relationship” to me.Yeah, no, I would NOT be ok with this if this were my boyfriend. At this point, I’m not sure what you’d lose is you just flat-out told him you’ve been invading his privacy and demand to know why he keeps financially supporting an ex he broke up with nearly a year ago.True, confronting him in that way almost guarantees some issues in your own relationships, but, honey, you’ve already got major issues. Some of them are practical, which I’ll get to in a minute. And do you think I should even bother, or should I cut my losses and run? But others will require you both to talk about your expectations in this relationship.While you want to be with Adam, you must understand that the person you’re in love with is somebody who has a family. Totally not healthy. One option might be for Adam and his ex to see a therapist who can help them navigate their co-parenting arrangement, creating parameters and offering tools for handling the kids when his ex is alone with them. Why hide it? He isn’t changing anything despite knowing that you know he’s a liar. You’ve asked him numerous times if he’s gotten rid of his joint credit cards with Kerry and you say he boldface lies to you each time you broach the topic. While people like to say “there’s no reason to snoop in a healthy, trusting relationship and it is a reflection of your insecurity”, I would agree with the latter, but not the former. We seem to keep having the same fights about his needy ex-wife and the negative impact she has on our relationship. My boyfriend is still in close contact with his most recent ex in a way which is troubling me. So many people lie and cheat and actually STEAL, and many of those people were in seemingly-healthy relationships with people who trusted them and who did not want to violate their privacy. His ex-wife is constantly texting and calling him about problems with their kids, and I can’t help but feel annoyed.I’ve been dating Adam for two and a half years. Maybe what you think you saw you did not see? I’ve never “snooped,” per se, but I have done the post-breakup Facebook stalking thing, and I have to say, it will ONLY make you feel worse.No matter how innocent everything is, if you snoop you are going to find SOMETHING that you can twist in your brain to be horrible. If you’re reading your loved one’s stuff, you’re looking for something and you don’t trust them.